What is an "Uncles' Party"?

A question posed to us:
I do have a couple of things I'd like you to clarify: Can you describe in more detail, the ceremonies called Family Reunion, Gathering, Uncles' Party, etc?

As I now understand it, these are more than mere 'picnics' where family members and friends get together to eat and enjoy each others company. But rather, there is more than one event planned around several days, with the Uncles' Party being the main event. No?

Wes' response:
Well, the Uncles' Party is a family reunion of sorts. It is a party put on by (you guessed it) the uncles -- for their nephews and nieces. But -- be forewarned -- my family has lots of practical jokesters in it. The first Uncles' Party about 20 years ago was such an affair.

For example, my uncle Willie walked around the entire week before rattling change in his pocket. Then one of the events at the Uncles' Party turned out to be a cash grab. There was a metal garbage lid on the lawn filled with money underneath. When the lid was lifted, the kids gathered around could keep whatever they got. All the kids were anxiously positioning themselves around the lid as the countdown began. 10-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...the lid came up and the kids dove in...to a pile of manure.

At the next Uncles' Party (where I was an Uncle-in-Training), the next batch of young kids (the sons & daughters of my oldest cousins) was taken to the side of the farm house where the party was being held. All the adults were gathered in chairs on the front lawn under the trees. One at a time the kids would be brought around the house with a blindfold on. It was time to play Touch the Cow.

My father, a big lumbering man, would stomp his feet and resonate a deep "Moooooo!" in his cupped hands. The child would be told that someone was bringing one of the cows over. When the "cow" was in place, the kid would be told to reach forward and touch the cow's ear. A tentative hand would come forward and an aunt would let the finger touch a furry slipper. Then the kid was told to touch the cow's tongue. This was always done with more trepidation. Another aunt would let the finger touch the "rough" side of a damp washcloth. Then everyone gathered around would say "Turn the cow around! Turn the cow around!" My father would boom the ground with his feet and some commotion would go on. Then the kid would be told "Now touch the cow's tail." Again, a tentative finger would be proffered. "A little further." Then, when the kid was sure he/she was close, one aunt would jab a coffee-mug full of chocolate pudding onto the finger just as another aunt would yank off the blindfold and just as everyone yells "Oooooh! The cow moved his tail!" The suddenness of it all would have the kid seeing a chocolate pudding-covered finger, thinking he'd just touched a cow's butthole.

It really is twisted, and also funny as hell.
>: )
Maybe it was a precursor to why on earth I'd post "Things from Wes' Nose"

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